While we were still hugging ourselves with joy at seeing the crew back on the small rouge one we may have failed to spot the fact everything was a bit less, well, Dwarf-ish on board. Thanks to the nanobots' miscalculations Starbug was briefly a mere fly in the ship's belly, hence flying into a part of a rat usually more associated with exits. And they don't even get danger money…
9. Rimmer the stud
Any bookie this side of your nearest Black Hole would offer long odds on the Arnold Judas Rimmer becoming the frizzy-haired answer to a deep space Russell Brand. Thanks to a shot of sexual magnetism virus though he was suddenly more attractive to the ship's female crew than a 50% off voucher at posh shoes 'r' us. No wonder Hollister knew something was up.
8. Blue Midget shakes its tailfeather
We knew that Cat was a pretty smooth operator, but when it came to wooing a flight controller he really did excel himself. Turning the Blue Midget from the clunky space equivalent of a Vauxhall Nova into a toe-tapping jig machine was testament not only to his flair for style, but also for how desperate being trapped on Starbug with Listie and co can make a fella.
7. Sing, Canary
Even by Lister's impulsive standards signing up for something called 'The Canaries' seems misjudged. Rather than the heart-rending a capella choir he was hoping for it was a rather more sinister cannon-fodder sort of deal. Still, could have been worse – could have been something to do with Norwich City. And they did manage to fit in one rousing little tune…
6. Whatever will be, will be
There are certain things which are inevitable. The X Factor will always manage to find people with less sense of perspective than Elton John's florist, for example. And Lister, no matter how hard he tried not to, was always going to kill Cassandra. Seeing exactly how was still a feat of ingenious engineering though. We'll never look at a piece of chewing gum the same again…
If you leave to one side the crippling blow to his android self-esteem, Kryten being classified as a woman was actually quite a positive move. Not only did it see him embrace his feminine side (nail-varnishing his whole foot in the process) it also meant he became the Rupert Murdoch of mucky shower programming. Krytie, you had us at pogo stick…
4. Extreme makeover
Remember when Kryten was a timid, can't say Smee-Hee to a goose sort of mechanoid? Well, those days are gone, as he showed when he used Listie and Rimmer to boost the ratings on Krytie TV with some extreme Changing Rooms action. Their onion-sandwich 'n' pubes decorating was funny enough, but making them undo their handywork turned Kryten into the Jupiter Mining Corps' own Jeremy Beadle-bot.
3. Shooting some hoops
Our intrepid crew aren't exactly known for their physical exertions but they jumped at the chance of taking on the guards. Well, not jumped at – more were pushed to the floor by, to be honest. Still, they had a secret weapon up their prison-issued sleeves, and suddenly, thanks to a bit of sneaky horn-inducing drink spiking, it wasn't only their score which was firmly on the up.
2. Kryten can't keep it in his pants
We knew being called a female wasn't good for Kryten's psyche, but no one could have predicted that he'd set about trying to rectify the situation in such a Blue Peter-inspired fashion. He made himself a penis, called Archie, out of electron boards, sticky-back plastic and an Action Man turtle neck jumper. Sadly he couldn't control it any better than us humans and it went AWOL, attacking poor Cat…
1. A bad period
Let it never be said that the male contingent of the gang aren't sensitive, modern and perceptive. Just look at all the effort Kryten went to on Krissie's part when he found out it was her time of the month. It's not every day you get a banner telling you to have 'a fantastic period' now, is it? And was she happy? Well, it was her time of the month, after all…